0 - If a cat walks into a dishwasher and the walls of a random kitchen are blue, the pencil that was used to write on the floor of the dynasty Ming Imperial palace will prevail, therefore forcing Luke Skywalker to become an ugly pink hippo, and you'll have orange luck until a yellow cow with green ooze on it's face goes rampant and starts seeking a deadly amulet to end the life of all.
0 - Tom Preacher wanted to horse race, but had heard that donkeys are better racers than horses. He bought a donkey and joined a race. He came in third place. The headline on the newspaper the next day said
"Preacher shows ass at third place"
Later he joined another race, and that time he came in first. The headline said
"Preachers ass scores first place"
The bishop was shocked at this, and ordered Tom to give the donkey away. The headline the next day said
"Bishop scratches Preachers ass"
The donkey went to a nun, who already had one, so the headline said
"Nun gets another ass"
The bishop was angered and ordered the nun to sell the donkey. the headline the next day said
"Nun sells ass for 10$"
The bishop was about to faint, so he ordered the nun to buy it back and release it into the wild. The headline said
"Nun sets ass wild and free"
It was no suprise when the bishop was found dead.
0 - One day two people were talking. One said,
"I'm going to remember the good things I've done so far in my life."
The other said,
"Are you done yet?"
